Muggle Camp
by Rubeth
Summary: Hogwarts is closed for the safety of the students, and the 6th and 7th years are assigned a compulsory group and activity for the summer.  This is all fine and dandy with the kids, but then they find out it's in the muggle world!  Rated T for swearing.


**Disclaimer: I own neither the characters or the world of Harry Potter. I do, however, own the plot, any wizarding characters that I make up, and all the muggle characters.**

* * *

"Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?" Blaise Zabini chanted as he continuously bashed his Italian head on the window bus seat in front of him, which just so happened to be my seat, "Why? Why? Wh-"

"Blaise, will you knock it off, already?" I spun around onto my knees to lean over the back of the leather bench and smacked Blaise upside the head. I was in a horrible mood, so I didn't have the patience to ignore my best friend. "Listen, you little prat, I don't care how ugly or tacky this chair is, but the seat currently belongs to me, Draco Malfoy, and you fucking bashing your ugly skull into it isn't helping me forget why we're here!"

"Yeah, Blaise. You're just making the bloody situation worse." Pansy Parkinson added from beside me in her aisle-seat.

I turned my head towards the beautiful girl that I was proud to call my girlfriend, gave her quick wink and flicked Blaise in the nose before I turned back around to face the front and offered Pansy a high-five.

As Blaise leaned back into his seat, softly mumbling about how delicate his nose was, Pansy shuffled her items around her to make as little room as possible for the 9 other students that would be joining us on this hideous, nasty-smelling, 20 person mini bus.

The bus driver was outside making arrangements with a few of the professors, so me, Blaise and Pansy had the cramped bus to ourselves for a while.

I settled myself on the headrest, and closed my eyes, thinking about the day before, when Dumbledore had announced that we had to go to the filthy muggle world.

* * *

"Attention, students. It has come to my attention that the Ministry of Magic is dealing with some terribly rough issues of concern and it has been concluded that Hogwarts School Of Witchcraft and Wizardry will not be safe for the next few months. It is of my great regret to inform you that Hogwarts will be closed until further notice" Dumbledore declared to the students and professors that were eating their breakfast in the great hall.

"WHAT!" the entire student body shouted in disbelief.

Dumbledore chuckled half-heartedly at how his school managed to shout in unison, but the smile disappeared when he remembered why they were shouting.

"Yes. It's true. And there is sadly nothing that we can do, so instead of education here at Hogwarts, the students are asked to continue to pursue their learning experience with a set task that shall be completed over the next few months." Dumbledore continued.

Again, the student body replied in unison, however it was more of a simultaneous groan rather than an outraged exclamation. The kids then fell into silence to listen to the rest of his announcement.

"We ask the 1st to 5th year students to please finish their breakfast in the next half an hour, and to make your way to your House meeting to learn of what your homework is for your period of absence from our school. Any one who does not attend their house meeting will have house points deducted, along with a detention.

"The rest of you — which is the 6th and 7th years plus professors — are to remain after breakfast to hear of your set task, as there is fewer of you. I apologise once more for this inconvenience. Thank you."

The hall burst into a loud buzz of confusion as the headmaster finished his speech and joined his fellow professors at the staff table.

34 minutes later, the last of the 1st to 5th years had cleared off, leaving the 6th and 7th year students anxiously waiting at the four large student dining tables.

As Dumbledore made his way up towards the front of the raised ground where the teachers ate, the nervous chatter of the students quieted down to let him speak.

"Thank you for your patience, everyone," He began.  
"Again, I do apologise for the bother that closing down Hogwarts for the time being will cause, but like I said earlier: There really is nothing I can do about it if it means you all stay safe.

"Of course, I could shut the school down and let you all go on extra vacation," the students in the hall gasped with excitement "but no, I simply can't have that. Where would the education be in that, eh?" the gasps of excitement turned into groans of grief.

"So the staff here at Hogwarts, along with myself of course, have agreed on making sure that you get a learning experience, but you get to choose what it is that you do to get it." The groans quickly turned back into excitement and glee.

A chatter of great delight arose around the hall, most students determined on making sure that at least one person heard their idea on how the funnest things to do.  
The quieter ones quickly got a headache from the noise, and luckily Dumbledore noticed.

"Hush!" He whispered in a soft and peaceful, yet still powerful, voice.

The noise quickly died down as Dumbledore continued to speak.

"I believe that many of you already have lists of ideas bursting out of your head, but you may need to cut down, as there is two conditions to this homework… You will all be split into groups and complete a requirement of my choice. It will also be in the Muggle world."

Groans once again filled the hall.

That bastard of a Headmaster.

* * *

The annoying little smart-arse voice of the one and only Hermione Granger interrupted my thoughts. I didn't know if I was glad that I was distracted, or if I was upset by the cause of the distraction. I decided I was both.

I groaned softly and I opened my eyes to see her through the window walking towards the bus, followed by her bodyguards Harry Potter and Ron Weasley, and his little dweeb-of-a-sister, Ginny Weasley.

Her muffled conversation went on as the group got close enough for me to hear what she was talking about.

She was droning to them about her freaking little house-elf rights club, which I believed was complete bullshit. The little brats don't deserve any fucking rights. They only exist for the main purpose serving our every needs.

She looked up at the bus windows and I swear on my life that for a mini fraction of a second she paused and gasped when she saw me. She blinked and looked away, shaking her head and continued to walk and talk.

Knowing Granger, she was probably paying attention to where she was going, no matter how deep she was into her little ramblings.

But then I saw her silver phone sticking out of her purple skinny jeans (purple? Really? With green sneakers? Someone call the fashion police!).

I flipped my own mobile out and dialed her number, thankful for the first time in my life that I had taken Muggle Studies and had the entire classes number's programmed into the mobile's that they had given us.

I glanced at Pansy and we nodded. She shuffled her feet around to make some arrangements.

I recognized the Mudblood's ringtone, even from 20 meters away on the other side of a bus wall. It was the theme song from that stupid movie we watched in Muggle Studies about muggle's versions of ghosts. Ghost Catchers or something…

The mudblood's 'speech' trailed off when she heard her ringtone. Her head snapped down to her pocket to find her mobile, and something in her eyes looked genuinely ecstatic. Why do I get the feeling that the only calls and texts she gets are from Potty, Weasel, Female Weasel and her mum? What a loser.

Luckily for my plan, she absentmindedly climbed onto the bus, staring at her phone. I had my number hidden so she was probably wondering if she should answer it.

The group behind her had given her some space and privacy so she could answer it, and were greeting their friends Cho Chang, Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan who had caught up with them.

Granger had finally decided to answer the phone (after an entire minute of it ringing, might I add) and lifted the reciever to her ear.

I whispered "Don't look down" into my own cell, and quickly hung up and hid it from view.

Granger held a confused expression on her face for a split second and realisation hit her when she glanced at my knowing smirk, but she didn't have time to actually look down. Too late. She tripped on Pansy's foot that was_ conveniently _sticking out into the aisle.

Being Granger, the Mudblood somehow managed to twist around when her foot caught Pansy's, and as she twisted her body tilted to the seats on the opposite aisle and she belly-flopped onto those, a sickening crunch coming from her nose.

Blaise dropped his pouty look and joined us in laughing at Granger who had given up on struggling to get off the top of the seats, and had fallen asleep. What a lazy prat.

When the Potty Crew had ditched helping Cho, Dean and Seamus clean up a spilled suitcase to instead gather around the Granger around her to see if she was alright, they discovered that she had fainted. We laughed even harder.

We stopped laughing when Weasel Junior slapped Pansy across the face, but then Pansy stood up and slapped her back, calling the redhead a 'bitch'.

Me and Blaise high-fived at the oncoming cat fight we could sense, while Harry and Ron were panicking over the filthy Mudblood's limp body. I don't know why really…  
If I was them, I'd forget the fucking comatose-girl and focus on the hot cat-fight that was beginning to grow more and more intense by the second.

The two girls were really going at each other. They'd fallen onto the floor, and had rolled to near the front of the bus.

That Weasel girl was screaming and clawing at Pansy's back, who was gripping at the fire-red hair and appeared to be trying to rip it all off the freckled-girl's head.

Things just got really weird when Loony Luna walked up the steps of the bus and stood next to the empty driver's seat. Her blank eyes scanned the bus, and stopped when they met mine. She walked down the aisle, her blank gaze locked on mine, and she absentmindedly stepped over the fighting teenagers and stopped. Her expressionless eyes blinked then turned around to look at the wrestling girls.

"Shut the fuck up!" She screamed at the two. They shutted the fuck up.

Woah. Where the fuck did Loony get the vocals for such a vicious sound? She can be so creepy sometimes…

Luna wandered to the back corner of the bus, ignoring the curious glances from her peers, and deposited herself down in the seat, and waited. For what exactly we didn't know...

As Pansy and female Weasley stood up and flicked off the dirt and dust covering their clothes, Neville climbed on the bus. He and Luna locked eyes and he grinned like a mad man.

"My love!" He yelled and sprinted towards the dazed Loony, dumping his arse on the seat next to her. They leaned in to face each other and made disturbing kissy face at each other and tapped noses together lovingly.

Everyone on the bus looked away in disgust. Can't they keep their so-called 'romance' to themselves? It's disgusting how they display such affection in public.

I quickly made out with my girlfriend before she sat down next to me again, while Young Weasel headed over to help Harry and Ron lift up the now-awake Granger. She was staring at me… and she looked angry…

"You bastard!" She screeched after being helped to her feet.  
"This," she pointed to her blood-covered nose, "is all YOUR fault!"

**A/N**

**Okay. So it's not very good because I wrote it at 3 o'clock this morning, but it's a start.**

**Thoughts? **

**Hate it? Wanna date it?**

**I accept all kinds of criticism cos it's my first go at writing, so anything is helpful :)**

**HishazelEyes28: Bahaha. No. It won't be an amnesia one... But trust me... I WILL be adding more characters...  
****Oh.. the characters I will add.. the fun that they will have... :D**


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